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New job [25 Mar 2017|10:56pm]
Today, I begin my new career.
Job title: husband.
I still have a lot to learn and I'm blessed to have a wonderful colleague to help me out. We may be in different departments but we're still working in the same partnership. You may not know this but you have taught me so much. From responsibility to patience to thinking before I act.

We've been through so much and I can't believe that you are now my wife. You've given me so much and I hope to be able to give you just as much in my lifetime. We may argue and bicker but it all ends with immense joy when I know that we'll embrace our differences and come out stronger than ever before.

You really are my best friend. I'll always have your back and I know you'll have mine.


My beautiful Wan Ru.

From this day, I promise to give you my mind, my soul, my heart, my body, my life.

I promise to be honest and forever faithful to you and only you.

I promise to always be a source of comfort for you, to listen to your complaints when you've had a long day at work, and to give you hour-long back massages even when you don't ask for it.

I promise to hug you and wipe your tears when you are sad or EVERY SINGLE TIME you watch a movie.

I promise to never ever give up on us, no matter what obstacles may come.

I promise that I will love you, for now, until the end of days.

As long as the sun chases the moon, I will chase you down till the ends of the world.

New job [06 Jan 2016|03:06pm]
Second job!

It's been a while since I've been here. Most significant milestone in my life is that I'm now engaged to the most beautiful angel in the world - SWR. Just came back from an awesome trip with her in Japan, and am going to look into wedding preparations. New house at Boon Keng is gonna be ready by the end of 2016. So much awesomeness in my life!

Oh and secondary to that is my new job at Golden Equator Consulting as a Business Anal-yst. Ysting sphincters one hole at a time.. Learning a whole lot in this new job and totally loving it! Looking after a lot of new, semi-new and old companies, helping them grow and all.

One company of note is stash, and this is me doing my job and testing the product: SOCIAL COMMERCE POWERS GO!!!! http://bit.ly/1Z7A1rt

I'm gonna be 30 soon. Damn I is old. Old but happy with life! :D

Gao Eyebrows [01 Oct 2014|02:13pm]
Just to remember:

On 09/16/14 10:30 PM, tan darryl wrote:
Hi Edris. Thanks for the connection. I noticed that you are a Intern at Ate ideas. I'm curious as to what you get to do.

On 09/19/14 3:19 AM, Edris Dzulkifli wrote:
Hi Darryl,

I'm actually not an intern anymore. I haven't been updating my LinkedIn which I know may be detrimental to my career progression, but alas, I am lazy, and being a technological luddite, I fail to grasp the lure and importance of social media platforms.

Now on to what I do. After completing my internship, my qualities as a hardened Sai Kang Warrior gained me enough recognition to be promoted to a Consultant. Now what does a Consultant do? Contrary to the title, the only form of consulting that I have ever had the chance to do was when the HR personnel asked me about a faulty light, and I provided them with a list of hardware stores in the vicinity for them to purchase new lights. What I actually do is deal with people screaming at me because they can't get discounts at restaurants.

I basically run a dining programme, and I organize events every now and then. I speak to restaurants, customers, bank partners, and designers, and I try to get them all to do one thing - make my job easier by simply saying yes to everything I ask from them. My Sai Kang Warrior skills have not gone to waste. I have tied 123847293874 knots, collected 12983419 cardboard boxes from nearby disposal areas, and carried 1284379832 books from point A to point B,C,D,E,F, and washed 35928 plates. Kindly note that this is not an exhaustive list of what I do on a daily basis.

I enjoy my job, but I highly doubt that the skills I have learnt will grant me any progression in this or any other company for that matter. I am resigned to my fate, after all, we all die after some time anyway.

Thank you for hearing me out. this has been surprisingly therapeutic for me. Feel free to ask me more questions. I enjoy taking short breaks from replying e-mails to reply e-mails.

Edris, The Sai Kang Warrior

On Fri September 19 2014, tan darryl wrote:
Haha that is indeed interesting.

Actually I'm currently seeking to expand my business and is in the process of shortlisting some people to work with me on a part time basis.

Would you be interested in a business opportunity to earn some additional income in your spare time?

On 09/19/14 9:17 AM, Edris Dzulkifli wrote:
While the phrase 'business opportunity' is indeed an incredibly unique and novel idea and would get anyone to do anything you say (much like how a Jedi master uses mind tricks), you have to understand that I have a few reservations, and I would need to clarify a few points before deciding if I'm interested to be interested in considering to take interest in this 'business opportunity'.

1) how long is your short list?
2) where do you groom your eyebrows?
3) how did you come up with the name g4u? Is that l33T sp34k for 'GAO', meaning thick? Thus making the company name essentially 'thick worldwide'?

On 09/19/14 7:40 PM, tan darryl wrote:
To answer your questions,
1) Well my short list is pretty expansive.
2) Haha i'm born with them. No grooming involved for the eyebrows
3) G4U was actually coined because of the nature of my business. I'm currently dealing with FMCGs. Hence G4U is a short form for Goods for you.

On 09/19/14 9:17 AM, Edris Dzulkifli wrote:
Thanks for assuaging my concerns, Darryl. You have truly magnificent eyebrows.

Your answers to my queries have made me take interest in being interested in your company. However, in order for me (and for anyone else) to develop even more interest in your glorious 'business opportunity', I would strongly suggest changing the company name. I have been working for a marketing company for over 2 years now, so this equates to me being a wise old sage in the field of "getting people to take notice of you".

G4U does not have a ring to it, and is far too literal which means it lacks flair and wit. I would suggest re-naming the company to something else. I have come up with a list of names that would be awesome substitutes based on how they've fared in the FMCG market over the years:

1) MacDonalds
2) Starbucks
3) Shell
4) Manchester United
5) Virgin

I especially like option #5, as it is representative of a young and budding enterprise that eagerly wishes to expand.

Do let me know your thoughts about these options that I have provided.


Introducing Mr G4U (GAO) Eyebrows himself:


I've lost [17 Sep 2013|11:28pm]
There's one thing that I've always wanted in life. Love.

Not just any kind of love. The kind of love that drives you crazy. The kind of love that makes you wake up every morning feeling an indescribable sense of ecstasy that borders on delirium. The kind of love that comes once in a lifetime, sometimes never at all. The kind of love that lasts for an eternity, like the Sun and the Moon. That kind of love.

Against all odds, I found that kind of love. It brought me to tears. It drove me crazy. It made me feel like life was all about her; the most perfect being to ever grace this Earth. She was my Moon. And as dark as my soul was, I did everything I could to be her Sun. Together, we shone. We were indestructible. We were two lovers caught in an endless dance.

I thought I had finally won in this race we call life. I beat the straight A scholars, the billionaire tycoons, the flashy celebrities, the cancer survivors, the inventors and innovators of our time. Despite all their achievements, I won. I had her. My Moon.

I wish I knew how special she was. I wish I had shone with all my might. I didn't. I took her for granted. I was selfish. My light was tinted, dark, gray and sullied. I ruined her. I took the most beautiful thing in my life and I broke it. Never will I be able to mend the damage I had done. She gave me everything and I just kept taking.

I lost her. I've lost my Moon. Now left in the darkness, I have no light to show me to the right direction. I'm left to wander the darkness alone. Wander. WANder. I miss her so freaking much. I don't know what to do now. I have no idea how to go on with my life. I'm lost. I've lost.

I love you Wan Ru. I will always love you.

craving (i know this is the subject title, not my mood, but i don't care) [05 Apr 2013|05:41am]
i miss school. i miss waking up whenever i feel like it. i miss spending days on end with you. i miss waking up to your face every morning. i miss going to sleep knowing you're safe in my arms. i miss you.

work is starting to become tedious. i don't want to grow up. i want to talk like a baby. i want to be carefree, adventurous, curious. i want you.

i love you so much. it hurts so much whenever i have to leave. i feel like crying every time the literal distance between us grows as we start to separate ways. this literal separation makes me feel like dying. i need you baby. can't wait to see you.

i love you with all my heart.

you're not all that [31 Jan 2013|07:25am]
you're not the most handsome man in the world
you're not the coolest kid in town
you're not the smartest genius
you're not the most articulate speaker
you're not the sweetest boyfriend
you're not the perfect guy

remember that.
time to get some perspective.
pick it up, be better than what you are now.
you've got something great and perfect and beautiful in front of you. don't let her slip away.

i love you wan ru.

[18 Jun 2012|04:35pm]
why do people sound so different on blogs? they sound nothing like they don in real life..
suddenly so verbose and articulate.. HAHAHAHA wah i so action ah? use VERBOSE.. is that right? wait i go check in google first.............................. "more words than necessary".. hahaha. yay! i'm so smart!

but seriously, blogs make everyone sound extra smart and intellectual and broody.. and when i read my friends' blogs i'm surprised at the thoughts that actually go through their mind.. do they really analyze all the little details in life and develop theorems and hypotheses about the shape of fruits and the stains on peoples' shirts? if that's the case then everyone's walking around with massive headaches.. either that or i'm really REALLY vapid.. my mind's blank for like three quarters of the day... 

yay.. found a new blog to read every night before i sleep.. :D

i have succumbed.. [04 Jun 2012|02:49am]
yes i've become a facebook user... i've started using instagram, REGULARLY.


it's 2012 and they've replaced the term poseur with hipster.. i'm not really sure if the two are inter-changeable but i've never really been one to delve into the nitty gritty titties.. who am i kidding i love tits... always have.. mmm.... tits...

ok.. got a little side-tracked there.. now what point was i trying to make? oh yes... hipsters... as much as i tried to deny my hipster-ness, i have to admit, i AM A HIPSTER... according to dax, i used to be part of a 'poser legion' so i guess it's just evolution, right?

i've just added several secondary school, jc and prrimary school friends on facebook. and the group that dax deemed the poser legion have all kept with the times and embraced hipsterism... 

i read an article on cracked detailing what it means to be a hipster. i have fulfilled the following criteria:
1) i'm wearing my grandmother's glasses (literally)
2) i own old/vintage sweaters
3) i shop at thrift stores
4) i've been denying my hipsterism for some time....
5) i smoke clove cigarettes

ok... this post seems very disjointed... i'm not exactly clear about how i'm structuring this entire thing.. and i don't really give a shit... just listing stuff down so that i can surprise myself when i check in again a few years down the road.. hmmm.. what else is new? well i'm still really really good looking and i still love myself very very much... i'm single.. i've had 4 relationships, i'm really trying to make it a point to not take myself seriously, ever.
and i love everything and everyone..

k done!

ENJOH!!! [24 May 2010|02:42am]
hmmm... cool... i am...
i am cool...

i can hardly understand my previous entries.. why do i insist on writing in riddles?
so much emotion back then... it's amazing how de-sensitized i've become to love...
just fuck n go... like a true cowboy... kool mmmaaaaannnnn....
yes i am..

note... edris, the time now is 0235hrs, may 24 2010.. and yes you're very intelligent for figuring out that the time and the date will be displayed once this entry is completed and that there was actually no need to tell yourself the time and date... you are champion.. top of notch..
ok.. you are in your second year of your degree course at SIM-UB... aimless in life just as you were 5 years ago... maintain brudder... don't push yourself or you will enter sage mode... yes.. this is the point in time when you are obsessed with shonen manga you cheena fuck.. get your act together... OH yes! and you still refuse to put up a facebook account...

YOU MUST READ THIS POST WHEN IT IS 2015!!! for reflecting purposes... and if you succumb to the pressure of social networking websites...

i probably won't understand a word i'm saying right now 5 years down the road... it's nice when you can surprise yourself..

wow.. so many new gadgets in the system.. how do i post this up?

resultzzzzz [01 Mar 2006|09:21pm]
[ mood | siow ]

i got me resultz. fiercest of the fiercest of the fiercest.
come to think of it, its actually not that bad. at least i get a second chance. unlike some of my friends who passed with grades like EEO and EEF. that's sad. stuck with such resultz and nowhere to go. except maybe NIE. always look at the glass half full, k guys? its not the end. it never is. even after death your name will live on through the ages. if we lead our lives fulfillingly we can attain immotality as people will be remembering our names. Immortality! Its yours! take it! ok gotta start studying all over again and hopefully this time i'll bust some sweet ass moves that'll blow your minds bitches! TTTKA!!


oops [17 Oct 2005|11:24am]
special thanks to Farid n Hafiz. Can't believe thay still remember my birthday. thanks guys. you guys are the greatest buds. feeling guilty now..

[28 Jun 2004|03:40pm]
crowd surfing is so much fun.
i must try to do it more often.
in any possible situation.
shitty shit shit.
i want to shit.

[25 May 2004|08:28pm]
i lost my handphone.
i lost my cash.
i lost myself.
lalala lalala
the nights is warm.
i'm sweating.
im tired.
lalala lalala

talking 'thrash' sorry..
i feel so weird..
lalala lalala

[07 May 2004|05:54pm]
Singapore :1800 278 8863
Malaysia :1800 88 4848
Phlippines :1800 1331 4488
Indonesia :0800 1111 222
Thailand :02352 9000

i feel like shit
i am shit
i feel like shitting
i have shit for brains
i just took a shit
i know wads bullshit

wadeva man.
i'll think for myself thank you.
even if it is shit.


[03 Apr 2004|03:15pm]
i lie?
i know i ruin lives.
i am terrible. oh dear god why?
i just want simplicity.
i dun want hate. lets not hate each other.
i miss my simple life.
i dunno wad ive done.
i know its wrong. the hurt ive caused.
i want to stop it.
i want to stop making mistakes.
i have to try at least. for my own good.
i think im sounding selfish.

i want a lot of stuff i cant get.
i hate it.
i suck.

[19 Mar 2004|09:47am]
now that you've mentioned it,
i realise that i am a rather detestable person.
i have only this small clique of friends.
n im not exactly the most likeable person to them either.
whatever man.
wad i've got is enough.
i can bloody hell keep to myself my whole life.
schools starting soon.
i think i'll pretend i'm dumb.
i'll be alright on my own.
so what if all of you hate me?
i dun give a fuck.
i'll drown myself in sleep n heavy/thrash/black/death metal.
anything loud enough to drown my existing problems.
see? i can turn to music n sleep.
i dun need anyone's love or concern.

who am i kidding..

DEMONIC SALUTATIONS! [17 Mar 2004|06:15pm]
demonic salutations!!

just came home from one n a half hour of complete nuklear desecrating battlebeats (jamming).
today was a little scary.
qadir n ariffin were like on the verge of an all out brawl.
fierce sia.
after that we were all going like 'fight ah! fight ah!' to each other.
recorded the sesi on md..
hope it'll be of thunderous n apokalyptik quality.
abang syaithan is so much friendlier than apek tempang. n stronger too. like giant sia.
well i think i wud have had a better time at tpjc..
oh well..
n i've got slayer n megadeth dvds!!
the fun i'll have.
im gonna miss certain ppl when i leave.
i think i wanna die.
oh well
fare thee well
(how worried or not?)


[16 Mar 2004|09:03pm]
hello world!
just came home from the salon.
my first time at a salon.
the bloody hairdresser trick me sia.
say hensem hensem la.
say look like eurasian la.
then give me stupid hairstyle.
was too caught up in the 'compliments' to realise the shitty job she was doing.
silly me.
planned to accompany someone to tpjc tomolo but the person has company already.
so now its been replaced with heavy desecrating metal time with the blitzkrieg who play rock n love to spank the pretty ladies.
hoo yeah!
oh well.
maybe i'll cry tonight.
maybe i won't.

"u cut botak also hensem la. next time cut botak la"

[13 Mar 2004|07:06pm]
mid-day crying is just as bad.
my eyes hurt.
i feel so empty.
my house is empty.
its pouring n the thunder booms.
n i feel so hated.
so terribly terribly hated.
i dunno what to say sorry for.
yeah yeah i'm selfish.
but i can't help it.
i'm sorry.

sob... [13 Mar 2004|03:53pm]
[ mood | crappy ]

seeing her hurt burns me so much.
late night crying is such a chore.
u cant breathe n u feel like dying.
burning burning.
it hurts.
watched james bond today.
Q died.
oh yeah he did.
n i feel like crying some more.
i cant help but feel the burn.
how the hell do people get over it?
cos i just cant.
i still burn.
the smell makes it worse.
the smell.
i hate this.
i think i still need it cos.
lonesome nights suck.
i still miss it.
i still burn.



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